BADass SINema Unearthed - Blu-ray Review

Contamination .7 (1993) - Blu-ray Review

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Contamination .7 - Blu-ray Review

2 beersHoly shit!  Tree roots from Hell!!  Edited together in such a way to kill any sense of forward momentum, the sheer lunacy of Contamination .7 (also released as The Crawlers, Troll 3, and almost any other title imaginable) makes this release from Scream Factory a radioactive festival of goofy shit.

This is a bad, bad, very bad, no good movie that – due to the one-two knockout punch of bad acting and bad directing – often becomes tedious and quite amusing.  No doubt about it, Contamination .7 is a beer guzzling party movie for the midnight matinee lovers out there who can withstand the tone-deaf dreck it constantly offers.

Scripted jabs in the hands of these bad actors become seriously odd lines of dialogue and weighty moments of death and destruction become lighthearted affairs as the film struggles to save face by pantomiming what other horror films do so well.  Even establishing shots seem out of place.  While some actors get the kind of movie they are in, others appear to have never received the memo.

Contamination .7 is the tale of a homecoming gone very wrong for two women on the same bus, Josie (Mary Sellers, Ghosthouse) and Susan (Chelsi Stahr).  Josie is on her way home after being gone for a number of years in order to make a name for herself in the big, bad city for a number of years.  Susan, trying to get to her boyfriend in Seattle, just wants to get laid.  She’s about to have the worst day ever.  It ends with her becoming plant food.

The roots are attacking.  Yes, it seems the cost-cutting efforts made by a nearby nuclear power plant aren’t exactly safe or sanitary for the local residents.  Something is growing alarmingly fast and large in the woods thanks to all the illegal dumping and we get invited to the green party circa POV shots aped straight from The Evil Dead.  We even get vines stinging up those unlucky enough to be caught in the woods late at night.

When Dr. Taylor (Bubba Reeves) discovers that his employer is dumping radioactive waste there, he is immediately threatened into silence.  As a full-time lush, it pays our habit well to keep your mouth shut.  His conscience; however, is another matter entirely.  He can’t help but do the right thing.  Of course, he has to fuck the local whore first or at least attempt to.  Every man in the town – including Josie’s boyfriend unimpressed by her new big city views – visits the aging vajayjay.  Turns out, she’s the best source of information about the happenings there.

When Josie and her boyfriend Matt (Jason Saucier) discover Susan’s cold corpse in the woods after a dip in a nearby stream, their objective to rekindle their interest in each other is sidetracked.  And the dumbass sheriff (Vince O’Neil who gets the award for best worst acting ever) doesn’t believe them either.  By the time he gets off his ass, the evil scientists at the nuclear power plant have collected the corpse.

None of this means the film is worth a shit.  It isn’t.  Directed by Fabrizio Laurenti (Witchery), the film shoots itself in the foot far too many times to be of any consequence with its sci-fi elements, but lovers of really bad films will certainly dig its peculiar brand of cinematic chaos.

This b-movie is lame enough to escape intended trash cinema and, since there is no nudity and no gore and definitely no scares, its existence as a horror film is a perplexing one indeed.  Exactly how does this one even take up space?

In the woods, no one can hear you scream.  Contamination .7 is a grand example of camp being repeatedly crucified for no real purpose.

Contamination .7 - Blu-ray Review

MPAA Rating: R.
Runtime:
91 mins
Director
: Fabrizio Laurenti
Writer:
Rossella Drudi
Cast:
Mary Sellers, Jason Saucier, Bubba Reeves
Genre
: Horror
Tagline:
They Hunt...They Feed...They Kill...You're Next!
Memorable Movie Quote: "Did you get our present?"
Theatrical Distributor:
Epic Productions
Official Site:
Release Date:

DVD/Blu-ray Release Date:
April 18, 2017
Synopsis: People from a small town are attacked by evil radioactive tree roots growing in the forest.

Contamination .7 - Blu-ray Review

Blu-ray

Blu-ray Details:

Home Video Distributor: Shout Factory
Available on Blu-ray
- April 18, 2017
Screen Formats: 1.85:1
Subtitles
: English SDH
Audio:
English: DTS-HD Master Audio Mono
Discs: Blu-ray Disc; aingle disc
Region Encoding: Locked to Region A

Scream Factory presents Contamination .7 on 1080p for the very first time.  The MPEG-4 AVC sports a newly minted HD transfer from the original camera negative that is crisp and colorful, adding value to the low budget affair when there originally was none.  Shadows are strong and the greens are both lush and deadly.  Skin tones are damn near perfect and the lines - even at deep night - are solid.  The sound is presented in a clear DTS-HD Master Audio Mono track that handles the delivery well enough.

Supplements:

Commentary:

  • Uh, no.

Special Features:

While the transfer has been newly minted from the original camera interpositive, the only bonus feature included is a trailer.

  • Trailer

 

 

Contamination .7 - Blu-ray Review

 

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